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That thing isn't a Herk.... Caveat: probably what people said about the -J.

Ghetto Fight... NSFW (language) https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=404_1322788796

I would normally never do this to a fellow airman, but I had the distinct pleasure of cock blocking a Tops in Blue tool bag on a flight to San Antonio a few months ago. We both totally lucked out by having a chick who was a Spurs cheerleader sit in the middle seat and the TIB tool didn't even let her get her seatbelt on before he told her he was in the Air Force (he had no idea I was too). She thought it was really cool and OBVIOUSLY asked him if he was a pilot. He immediately jumped in saying that all pilots were a bunch of prima donnas who didn't really do much other than take the credit for the work of MX and MSG types. He then told her how he just got picked for Tops in Blue and was going to be going to every combat zone in the world. It was hysterical; you'd have thought this guy was the T-Bird Lead Solo pilot who just won the Medal of Honor or something the way he was talking. He was PCSing in from Ramstein and said he hadn't been downrange yet. I just sat there quietly drinking a beer as she said two or three times that she thought pilots were a big deal in the Air Force and he kept trashing them. I finally just laughed a little when he said it again and she asked what I was laughing about... I told her I was apparently one of those prima donnas. She spent the rest of the flight with her back to him. I just couldn't let this hot chick think that this guy actually "represented" the AF! Sorry TIB tool... have better SA on talking smack on a flight to San Antonio! I've had lots of people tell me they are pilots now because they saw the T-Birds, Blues, demo teams, etc. at air shows when they were 4-5 yrs old (I'm one of them)... still waiting to meet the guy who joined because of Tops in Blue. I have an idea, before we start cutting demo teams (which actually are useful for recruitment) and more importantly before we start cutting 15 yr Majors... let’s start by cutting the AF Band of the Rockies... and the USAFE Band... and the ACC Band! Last time I was deployed there was a different shitty band with a dozen E-8's and E-9's being flown in by a C-17 every other week... to play your favorites from the 90's!!!

OUT-FVCKIN'-STANDING!

Judge - "You are charged with a speeding infraction, how do you plead? Me - "Deny" (you have three options "Accept", "Accept with explanation", or "Deny"). Judge - "What is your testimony?" Me - Handed Judge a diagram with trig function solving the beam spread, "Your honor, as you can see from the picture, given a five degree beam at 100', the beam width is 8.8' and there are clearly two cars in the beam". Judge - Shook her skull back and forth and said "you are absolutely correct, the state cannot say beyond a reasonable doubt which vehicle is speeding, case dismissed". Masshole...

Three cheers for dick-sucking!

If this whole conversation was happening in a real squadron bar I would kill myself.