This answers at least one of the questions, IMO, to be answered before changing out.
Can she/you handle recoil of something larger than, assuming, a 9mm?
Is capacity vs. caliber something you consider?
Can she/you deal with any malfunctions that could (not likely) occur with a semi-auto or would a revolver be a better choice (since you specified a couple of semis, I guess I know)?
Is budget an issue?
You named some very adequate, even good brands.
You don't lack for choices, so narrowing any of your variables down will help.
Just some advice from Capt Obvious...carry (see what I did there?) on...
Personally, my nightstand gun is a S&W M&P 9 with 17 rounds. Wife can use it as well. I carry, however, an XDS in .45. She carries a J-frame S&W .38.
The M&P has been utterly reliable through 1,000+ rounds.