USAFPilot, preach on. Saved me some thought - I was going to post something a lot shorter but with the same sentiment. I still feel inclined to comment though.
On the first part: Yes, it may be easier said than done, but IT IS THAT SIMPLE. Trust me dude, you're not the first guy who's fallen madly in love with a chick that you couldn't live without. However, generally speaking, you want that chick to feel the same about you. A relationship in which the level of give-a-fuck is disproportionate (i.e. yours) is doomed. If she really cared about you, she wouldn't be giving you every reason a life with her is incompatible with your dream. "She wants to have a real relationship and not always have me gone all the time." Shit, apparently my wife and I don't have a real relationship. Seriously? C'mon bro, you're better than that.
Second part: Bullshit. If you don't think you can get through it without some broad you've been dating really only a couple months, you don't want it bad enough. Besides, it may be a tough year, but it's not that bad. The more I think about it, the last thing you'll want/need is her whining about how Pensacola sucks, how much she misses NY, how she doesn't think she can do this, etc.
BTW, I had a ten year off-and-on relationship with someone I thought was the end-all, be-all...manipulative bitch. A lot of what you write sounds familiar. It almost affected my career, but I eventually manned up; my only regret being that I didn't end it sooner. (I didn't marry her, thank God). PM me if you want, just use paragraphs and proper grammar.
SIE IS NOT AN OPTION.
Great post with sage advice.