Lackland Buffoonery

[M2]

Although this no longer applies to me, I got a copy anyway...

All,

FYI/FYA. As the 37th TRW prepares for their upcoming inspection they are taking a hard look at individuals for compliance with uniform/appearance rules as well as other common customs and courtesies. There are personnel on the lookout for individuals violating the rules. Violators are being written up and handed tickets for violations. I don’t expect any of you are violating the rules but below is a list of infractions from the ticket (most, but not all, pertain to while in uniform:

AFI-36-2903

Pockets unbuttoned

Hat on indoors

Hat off outdoors

Hands in pockets

Walking/talking on cell phone

Eating and drinking while walking

Glasses on top of the head

Jogging with headphones

Items sticking out of cargo pocket

Unserviceable uniform items

Backpack/bag on the right shoulder

ABU hat ranger rolled

Not wearing a required uniform item

Unauthorized uniform item

Unauthorized hair items (female)

Hair not in standards

Driving and talking on cell phone

Running with no shirt on (males)

Trousers improperly bloused

Unauthorized colored socks

Unauthorized color T-shirt

Unauthorized jewelry

Customs/courtesies

Not saluting officer

Not saluting a staff car

Disrespect to national anthem

Failing to stand for a officer

Not on the ticket but passed to me by the 37 TRW Command Chief’s office:

Failing to pay proper respect during the service medley played at 1200 on Fridays

This is a matter of great importance to the 37 TRW for their inspection but proper wear of the uniform and observance of customs and courtesies should be as natural as breathing to all of us.

R/

Col *****

What, having your finger up your nose (or head up your ass) is not prohibited? Apparantly not!

The service medley thing on Fridays is also a new one on me. They actually expect folks in uniform to stand at attention under the full onslaught of the southcentral Texas summertime sun while they play the service medley? Well, sorry guys, I will be the civilian that walks around you and keeps on trucking.

Everytime I get another email like this, I am a little more happier that I retired three years ago.

Cheers! M2

[Timbonez]

Running with no shirt on (males)

So does this mean that women can run with no shirt on?

[Chutdoggin]

Running with no shirt on (males)

Does this mean females are allowed to run with no shirt on?

edit for timing ...thats just not fair, I totally saw it first

Edited June 1, 2009 by Chutdoggin

[MKopack]

Unauthorized colored socks

So much for my blaze orange hunting socks on Blues Monday...

Mike

...knew a guy who did that years ago during an FTD 'graduation' with the Colonel. 0-6 didn't notice, but the instructor nearly passed out when he did.

[Spoo]

Running with no shirt on (males)

Does this mean females are allowed to run with no shirt on?

Uh oh dog, think Timbonez beat you to it.

Edited June 1, 2009 by Spoo

[08Dawg]

Why does the Air Force have such a stick up it's collective ass about running with headphones? It's not as if a driver can't see when in your PT gear with that big huge reflective target on your back.

[Bergman]

Let's start an official contest to see who can get ticketed (YGBSM, btw) for the greatest number of violations at once??

Case of beer to the winner!

[Toro]

Driving and talking on cell phone

This one I can understand, but there is an AFN commercial where an O-6 stops an O-1 walking and talking on his phone in uniform and says, "Lt, be advised that IAW AFI 69-CMH, walking and talking on a cell phone in uniform is not authorized." UFB.

Why does the Air Force have such a stick up it's collective ass about running with headphones? It's not as if a driver can't see when in your PT gear with that big huge reflective target on your back.

It always kills me that you can get a ticket for running with your headphones, but dudes drive around all the time (most of them are probably SPs in their POVs) with the windows rolled up and the bass thumping so loud that it's impossible for them to hear anything. I say me with my headphones on foot is not as big of a threat as SrA Vanilla Ice in his souped-up Fiat pumping Justin Timberlake.

[Herk Driver]

The service medley thing on Fridays is also a new one on me. They actually expect folks in uniform to stand at attention under the full onslaught of the southcentral Texas summertime sun while they play the service medley?

Where is that written? Base Sup?

Sounds like someone needs to go take out the PA system or at least destroy that tape/CD.

Edited June 1, 2009 by Herk Driver

[Mutt]

"Not saluting a staff car"

Reminds me of a young female Lt I went w/ to DLI (I'm from PR, and even though I already spoke perfect English...1 1/2 mo. paid vacation). She swore up and down that since the car had the rank on it, whether occupied or not, we were required to salute. To be on the safe side, even if we were all walking as a gagle, she would render a salute to the ABW/CC's car in the parking lot.

[Spoo]

Where is that written? Base Sup?

Sounds like someone needs to go take out the PA system or at least destroy that tape/CD.

They were playing the Air Force song at noon on Fridays at Beale a couple years back, but you weren't required to stop or "pay due respect". Not sure what the motivation was. I guess so you know that it's 1200 on Friday without having to look at your watch. Or maybe it was so you could feel all Air Forcey and motivated rolling into the weekend.

EDIT: Added vital words like "the" and "at".

"Not saluting a staff car"

Reminds me of a young female Lt I went w/ to DLI (I'm from PR, and even though I already spoke perfect English...1 1/2 mo. paid vacation). She swore up and down that since the car had the rank on it, whether occupied or not, we were required to salute. To be on the safe side, even if we were all walking as a gagle, she would render a salute to the ABW/CC's car in the parking lot.

Oh that's awesome. She probably wears her reflective belt in her garage...can't be too careful you know.

Edited June 1, 2009 by Spoo

[Marco]

Damn, I'm glad I'm in the Guard.

[capt4fans]

And hopefully my Wg/CC won't pick up on that memo. Although I"m sure the "Fun Burgler" already has it in his in box waiting to send it off to "All Personel"

[Wolf424]

So what happens if someone gets a so called "ticket"? Will they get sent to the principle's office? Does everyone have to have hall passes? UFB...

[Guest Hueypilot812]

Why does the Air Force have such a stick up it's collective ass about running with headphones? It's not as if a driver can't see when in your PT gear with that big huge reflective target on your back.

Interesting...I'm trusted to fly and instruct in a C-130 with an Iraqi who's never flown the Herk before, and hasn't flown an airplane of ANY kind in 3 years, monitor two radios, listen to crew members calling out checklist items in broken English, talk to tower and whoever-the-f*ck-else who is speaking in broken English and Arabic...

Yet apparently I don't have the SA to jog on base with my headphones and avoid getting run over.

[outbreak]

I don't have a problem with most of those items. There's a point where we gotta remember that we're in the military and should look and act like it. Following 36-2903 doesn't make you un-cool.

The headphones thing, guys can't run topless thing, service medley; they piss me off, because they're senseless.

[brickhistory]

Everytime I get another email like this, I am a little more happier that I retired three years ago.

2 on retiring 15 months ago as well and being glad of it.

I recently moved jobs to a place that flies recce stuff really, really, really high; almost cosmic, you might say.

Overheard a conversation recently that was a genuine coffee-spewing moment:

"Well, I'm an operator. I think that those not working on the ops floor shouldn't be allowed to wear a bag."

Note: only wings in evidence were the ersatz space ones.

*and I usually don't chime in on the wings thing as the weapons controller/ABM ones I had are often scoffed at as well. But I digress...

[Guest Smoke_Jaguar4]

And here's what they look like:

[Wolf424]

And here's what they look like:

YGTBFSM, it's a F'n 341?!?!

[zrooster99]

I still don't get what's inherently unprofessional about wearing your sunglasses on your forehead...

[BQZip01]

I still don't get what's inherently unprofessional about wearing your sunglasses on your forehead...

...because someone with more brass than you or I thinks it is unprofessional. That's it.

[Herk Driver]

The date on that ATC form says it best. May '69

Edited June 2, 2009 by Herk Driver

[Stitch]

...She swore up and down that since the car had the rank on it, whether occupied or not, we were required to salute... even if we were all walking as a gagle, she would render a salute to the ABW/CC's car in the parking lot.

U... F... B... Uber shoe in the larve stage. Saluting an unoccupied parked car... where do these people come from?

[M2]

And here's what they look like:

G'damn, I haven't seen one of those SOBs for years! 28 years ago when I was at Basic, we had to carry two of them in our shirt pockets, folded over and under the pocket flaps so the TIs could just walk and pull one when they detected a discrepancy. I remember a TI walking up to a trainee and pulling one for some reason, then asking the kid how many 341s he had on him. Obviously the answer was 'one,' but the correct answer should've been 'two,' so the TI pulled his second 341. Luckily, the TI didn't ask him again...

Thanks for upheaving a long-buried memory, next thing you know and I will be hearing "pick 'em up, put 'em down!" over and over again in my sleep!

Cheers! M2

[Cooter]

I don't have a problem with most of those items. There's a point where we gotta remember that we're in the military and should look and act like it. Following 36-2903 doesn't make you un-cool.

...says future CSAF.

Cooter