BlackKnight Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 https://Uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/fighter_pilot I thought this was funny...
Guest IncompletePete Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 "Most fighter pilots chase women with cute asses. F-15 fighter pilots chase women with cute purses."
Bergman Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 (edited) My personal favorite... Fighter pilots each have their own "verizon network" consisting entirely of bikini clad beer girls with loose morals. Can you beer me now? Good. Edited June 12, 2009 by Bergman
nsplayr Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 Air Force pilots have perfected the one-person, in-flight "low five", which consists of keeping one hand on the stick while whacking off into the piddle pad with the other. Air Force flight suits can be distinguished from Navy flight suits by the presence of a special zipper installed for this purpose.So THAT'S what that zipper is for...
Stuck Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 YGBSM. "The seceret ingredient in redbull is sweat from a figher pilots ass crack, which explains the drinks peculiar taste, and its ability to 'give you wings.'" Classic. - Stuck
brabus Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 F-15 "Twin Tailed Butt Pirate" Didn't know the Eagle had more than one name!
contraildash Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 My Favorite: AV-8B (Product of a drunken one night stand between a Huey and an A-4)
Container STS Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 BULLSHIT on luke skywalker being a Fiter Peelot... I want to say he was a bomber pilot, but not everybody can lead their head out of their ass... Luke employed A-Sfc ordinance, had a back seater, and had to use the "force" to find his targets.
Stuck Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 (edited) So a viper driver following pre-programed steerpoints to drop GPS guided bombs from 30k is not a fighter pilot? I say Luke flies an X-Wing, he's a flippin fighter pilot. https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Wedge_XWingSaga.jpg Except for Porkins. He was not a fighter pilot. https://www.goingfaster.com/darkthoughts/kfcporkins.jpg Cheers! - Stuck Edited June 12, 2009 by Stuck
Toro Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 I have a new favorite website. Air Force, uncyclopedia style
Timbonez Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 My favorite from the Air Force article: The next phase in the Air Force of the Future will be to get rid of the BDUs. They felt a bit hurt by the Army's change so they've decided to go with their own style. Top Generals in the Air Force decided that they needed a distinctive Air Force uniform of their own, so they stole the Army's new color pattern and added blue, because the sky is blue and they are the Air Force after all. An effective camouflage pattern is not needed, because let's face it: If an Air Force member is ever so close to combat action that he has hide from the enemy, somebody ######ed up big time.
slacker Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 The Airman's creed I am an American Airman. I am a child. I will not question stupidity. I am a stepping stone. My mission is to get the management promoted. I am annoyed by a forever changing "heritage", A tradition of backstabbing, And a legacy of yes men. I am an American Airman, Guardian of stupidity and ignorance, My boss's b*tch and shield, His step and fetcher. I defend his dog and pony shows with my life. I am an American Airman: Disgruntled, aggravated and tired. I will never see a common-sense AFI, I am starting to falter, And soon I may fail. Much better than the orginal bullsh!t and closer to reality.
Stuck Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 "Rumor has it that Canada may also have an Air Force. This is most likely false considering it is widely known that Canada has no military." Nice. - Stuck
HerkDerka Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 I had a good laugh at this one: "F/A/FA/EA/EA-F/A-18A/B/C/D/E/F/G/G2/H/K Multirole Fighter " HD
Timbonez Posted June 13, 2009 Posted June 13, 2009 Off the Army page: Helicopters From the ancient Greek "heli" meaning "crashes" and "'copter'" meaning "a lot". Some people actually go to the bother of shooting these down, though why they do so is a mystery. A little patience, and they'll fall out of the sky of their own accord. Also, I think M2 likes it because they have a picture of him up there.
Container STS Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 So a viper driver following pre-programed steerpoints to drop GPS guided bombs from 30k is not a fighter pilot? I say Luke flies an X-Wing, he's a flippin fighter pilot. https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Wedge_XWingSaga.jpg Except for Porkins. He was not a fighter pilot. https://www.goingfaster.com/darkthoughts/kfcporkins.jpg Cheers! - Stuck Porkins had a waiver...he was also in finance before he went Undergraduate Space Pilot Training (USPT)
Stuck Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 I guess she can be, though. https://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=htt...DN%26start%3D36 Nerd porn! - Stuck
Scooter14 Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 The Air Force is best known for drunken parties, and is the number one importer of beer in most nations which have air forces. It manages to consume it from the hours of 1600 to 0730. The air force also has superhuman power to be able to drink beer more than any other branch...And yet they still don't beat up on army troops. We don't know why. It's suspected that it's because if they were tough guys to begin with, they probably wouldn't join the Air Force.
JarheadBoom Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 An air force is only classified as an Air Force if its leadership and ideas take ideas and concepts out of the air and present them as if they were concrete or factual. One manner in which an Air Force might do this is by creating mottoes for their squadrons and flights. For instance, a squadron might choose the motto "We Show The Way", despite the fact that it does nothing of the sort. Classic.
Timbonez Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 I found this one on the Other Military Forces section of the Air Force page: Royal Bear Force
Timbonez Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 I'm surprised they didn't use that pic on the Royal Bear Force page. Bear Force Battlefield Commands Roar!! - Attention! Roar!! - At ease! Roar!!! - Line up and attack the enemy!! Roar!! - You two stand over there and create a distraction while we flank them! Roar!?! - Where's our air support? Roar!! - Victory!! Roar!! - Retreat!! Roar!!! - CHARGE!!! Roar!!! - RUN AWAY!! (Purely hypothetical, bears do not run away. bears vamoose)
Stuck Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 "The following should be read in real time." CLASSIC. https://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Jack_Bauer Cheers! - Stuck
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