Spouses Groups in Non-Fighter Communities

[Guest ukwxbelle]

I am wondering if anyone can share some insight into how squadron spouse groups function (or if there are any) in the rest of the AF outside of the fighter world. My husband was casual with an F-16 squadron, did UPT, got 38s, IFF and was assigned F-16s, so that's my only experience with spouses groups(other than the OSC). He is transitioning to another aircraft, possibly C-17s, and I was just wondering what to expect. Are there monthly gatherings, First Fridays, or things like that? Or is there not really a squadron spouse group and most normally join the base OSC?

Thanks in advance for your insight- it'll be a change, but I'm excited for it!

[contraildash]

I'm in a small DV airlift squadron so the spouses are fairly active together, as are the crews. The C-17 folks that come to our squadron are usually surprised that we hold first Fridays and other SQ functions. Based on that I'm guessing that they aren't as active, but I could be wrong. As with anything, it depends.

Edited July 22, 2010 by contraildash

[The Kayla]

It doesn't matter if your husband was a fighter or not, there will be spouse groups, no matter what or where, you go. Fighter wives aren't the only ones that know how to have fun :)

My good friend's husband flys C-17s, and she is always going something with her spouse group.

[Guest ukwxbelle]

Well thanks for your replies. Like I said before, I've never experienced the other side of the house, so I'm just trying to gather any info I can. I didn't see any reasons why they wouldn't have a spouse group, just hoping they would. Easiest way to meet new people in a new place, right? :)

[Guest Crew Report]

Why is he going from Vipers to C-17's?

[Guest ukwxbelle]

Why is he going from Vipers to C-17's?

Not quite relevant to the topic at hand.

[Boxhead]

Not quite relevant to the topic at hand.

Maybe not to this tread, but you are going to need to prepare a statement to the whatever spouses club you end up in. Well, let me re-phrase, it's your and your husband's business, so you don't NEED to tell them a damn thing. But if you choose that route, you are most likely going to be not well recieved.

Simple fact, the C-17 is a pretty sought after "reward" for doing well in the T-1 track...having a pointy nose guy come over is going to generate some questions. Ususaly pointy nose folks that transition to slower airplanes go to one of the ACC slow planes...AMC used to pretty much forbid that bridge crossing.

So, if you guys end up going to AMC, prepare for some questions. You don't need to answer them, but just be ready.

Good luck where ever you end up!

[Guest ukwxbelle]

Maybe not to this tread, but you are going to need to prepare a statement to the whatever spouses club you end up in. Well, let me re-phrase, it's your and your husband's business, so you don't NEED to tell them a damn thing. But if you choose that route, you are most likely going to be not well recieved.

Simple fact, the C-17 is a pretty sought after "reward" for doing well in the T-1 track...having a pointy nose guy come over is going to generate some questions. Ususaly pointy nose folks that transition to slower airplanes go to one of the ACC slow planes...AMC used to pretty much forbid that bridge crossing.

So, if you guys end up going to AMC, prepare for some questions. You don't need to answer them, but just be ready.

Good luck where ever you end up!

Noted. Of course we will tell those in our community, and those who need to know. But some random nosey on Baseops . . . I didn't think it was necessary.

Edited August 4, 2010 by ukwxbelle

[Karl Hungus]

Noted. Of course we will tell those in our community, and those who need to know. But some random nosey on Baseops . . . I didn't think it was necessary.

Failing out of IFF/ B-Course/ whatever isn't something to be ashamed of. It may end up being the best thing to ever happen to him.

Suggestion on how to meet people at wherever you end up: Get a job. Go get a degree/ masters. Have a life outside of the Air Force.

[Guest ukwxbelle]

Failing out of IFF/ B-Course/ whatever isn't something to be ashamed of. It may end up being the best thing to ever happen to him.

Hey guys, my husband and I are in no way ashamed of this change of assignment. He had some trouble with 9Gs in the BFM phase of the B-course, and at 6'4" it's understandable! When his commander discussed options for reassignment with AFPC, C-17s were among the list of aircraft easy/possible to transition to, so that's what he listed for a top preference.

We are still awaiting word on everything, but as I said before, I was just trying to get a feel for what may lie ahead of us. Sorry for skirting the issue earlier, I was just a little put-off by the personal question from someone I don't know.

Edited August 5, 2010 by ukwxbelle

[Guest Crew Report]

Hey guys, my husband and I are in no way ashamed of this change of assignment. He had some trouble with 9Gs in the BFM phase of the B-course, and at 6'4" it's understandable! When his commander discussed options for reassignment with AFPC, C-17s were among the list of aircraft easy/possible to transition to, so that's what he listed for a top preference.

We are still awaiting word on everything, but as I said before, I was just trying to get a feel for what may lie ahead of us. Sorry for skirting the issue earlier, I was just a little put-off by the personal question from someone I don't know.

As said before, get used to fielding that question. It was an honest one, and I didn't intended it to be derogatory towards you or your husband, however we don't see many people come from the pointy nose community to the heavy community. If your husband does get what he wants he better get used to answering that question at the FTU and at your first assignment. Good luck.

Edited August 5, 2010 by Crew Report

[Guest]

He had some trouble with 9Gs in the BFM phase of the B-course, and at 6'4" it's understandable!

Actually, it is not quite so obvious or understandable. He's not the only 6'4" guy to ever fly a fighter. Most of us made it just fine.

Did he wash out of BFM? Did he pass the centrifuge? Did he gork out in the jet causing a physiological incident(s)? Big difference.

I wouldn't use euphemisms or stories when you get to your new squadron. Wives pick up on it pretty quick and can be pretty nasty if they think you're feeding them a line…like “We thought everything was perfect until we showed up at FTU. Unfortunately he was too tall and handsome and rich and well hung and smart to fly BFM in the F-16.”

Just tell it like it is…whatever it is. People can smell a skunk in the woodpile.

[Linda]

*ahem* Back to the question raised at the top of the thread.

In my personal experience with a multitude of different C-130 units (71RQS in 2000 had the closest-knit spouses' group I've ever encountered, bar none; Blue Tails were close all around the squadron; FL AFSOC not so close, but it's reversing course; UK AFSOC very close) it depends heavily on leadership's support and help to get / keep the ball rolling.

At our current assignment, the spouses are very active with the squadron for First Friday, Training Day, and a multitude of other events for fundraisers, parties, and meetings to pass along news/information. In the UK, there is also an OCSC (Officers and Civilian Spouses Club) as an option. It's on a base-wide level, and you get a larger cross-section of people from the area as participants.

Overall, if there's not something going at the squadron level, folks usually WANT it... it just might take some work to get the ball rolling.

Much luck to you both.

Regards,

Linda

[capt4fans]

Have to say, that he spouses club/association at my current unit isn't worth crap and I'm at an AMC base. My squadron is smaller than my first unit (I used to be on AWACS) and it's much worse. I would gladly trade my current AMC spouses for the ACC spouses that I had at my first unit. That being said, it all depends on the base and the level of commitment. Those we're around now seem to be a bunch of Miss Priss Southern Belles versus the Midwest women that we had at my first base. Just my 2 cents worth.

I do understand the problem with answering a question about why the change in assignment and not opening that can of worms here on this thread, and you were perfectly fine with that. However, everyone else is right on that you'll have to be ready to answer that question when you get to your next base.

[Guest NDwife]

I am a C17 wife and I have to say its going to be based on your squadron because each one has a different personality. There is no official group but each squadron will have phoenix spouses and they usually do a good job of organizing things for the wives to do. Stuff always amps up when the guys deploy since almost everyone is looking for things to do then. The squadron my husband is in now is not very active which fits me perfectly because I am not much of a joiner which is also why I can't tell you anything about the OSC because I have never joined. However I have good friends in one of the other squadrons and their squadron is very active, she is doing something at least once a week. Once you find out your next assignment maybe your husband's sponsor can put you in touch with someone with spouse info. As a C17 wife I have to say I couldn't care less where you guys came from or why you are no longer there although I suppose I know a couple wives who are bitchy like that. Overall I would say we are a more laid back community and IMHO a welcoming one.

Rainman why do you feel the need to come over to the spouses forum and be such an A-hole about everything? Surprisingly there seems to be some useful advice in your latest post but I don't see the need to be nasty about it.

[Guest ukwxbelle]

Simple fact, the C-17 is a pretty sought after "reward" for doing well in the T-1 track...having a pointy nose guy come over is going to generate some questions. Ususaly pointy nose folks that transition to slower airplanes go to one of the ACC slow planes...AMC used to pretty much forbid that bridge crossing.

however we don't see many people come from the pointy nose community to the heavy community.

Just wanted to share that he was re-assigned to C-130Js at Ramstein. Just further proof that it's becoming a different Air Force out there and that T-38/T-1 doesn't exactly mean what it used to anymore. Re: Anything Goes!

I'd like to thank everyone for their input to this topic.

Cheers!

Edited October 4, 2010 by ukwxbelle

[Sasquatch]

I grew up with my father being an active-duty pilot, and my wife's brother & bro-in-law are both USMC rotary wing aviators, so we're somewhat familiar with that side of things. I'm currently in the process of applying to guard UPT boards and was curious how socially active your average guard squadron is, especially with regards to spouses. My wife would appreciate an active spouse's group, but I have no idea if those even exist in the guard world. Any insight?

[Guest]

https://www.af.mil/News/ArticleDisplay/tabid/223/Article/554843/new-spouses-group-tailored-to-men.aspx

AVIANO AIR BASE, Italy (AFNS) -- Aviano's Integral Men, a new spouse group tailored to husbands of active-duty service members, held their inaugural event here Nov. 15. John Duarte, AIM's founding father, described the group as a reflection of a growing demographic that is often underrepresented. "I've been here since the end of June and I believe it's important to volunteer and get involved in the community as much as possible," Duarte said. "As I started to go to spouse's organizations and meetings I noticed I was the only male, or one of two. Although the groups would invite men, they would rarely come out." There was a divide, Duarte said. Spouses are often assumed to be women and at a commander's convention with his wife, Lt. Col. Rosie Duarte, the 31st Force Support Squadron commander, there was no exception. When spouses received their gift at the end of the event, Duarte got what every spouse did -- a broach. "My hopes are that we have a group that appeals to the male demographic and we'll have a stronger community involvement," Duarte said. To encourage male participation, AIM held their first event at the La Bella Vista Club, where attendees watched college football and had a cookout. "I'm thinking that if we get all the guys together for something like college football maybe we can get together for other events in the future," Duarte said. Some events Duarte hopes to hold in the future are tailgating at a soccer match, driving Ferraris at the test track, more college football Saturdays and cookouts. "I'm hoping AIM can serve as an outlet for some of the stress spouses deal with," he said. "I've been a school administrator for 28 years, I have my doctorate in education and I still don't have a job here. That's just an example of some things spouses are challenged with. In our group, you don't have to talk but just being around people who are going through the same problems as you could help."

I think this is a fantastic idea and I hope it succeeds.