It's all About Perspective

[Chiller]

As a former C-130 driver, SEFE and line puke, I had more than my share of fun in the course of 27 years on countless rotations, Panama, Europe, Africa, Southwest Asia, Desert Shield & Storm and Red Flag, etc. in the A's, B's and E's. But in August of 1993 it all came to an end when I retired. Now all there was to do was flying widebodies (flight attendants) between major population centers around the world.

I thought I would replace at least some of that former excitement and so I became active in the local aerobatic club and, after a few years, began teaching basic aerobatics and emergency recovery training mostly to pilots who have never been on their back in an airplane or experienced more than a couple of g's in a 60 degree bank. The following is a recollection of one of those lessons.

I'm waiting for my student in the lobby of the FBO where I keep my airplane; a 1983 Pitts S-2B. And I'm agonizing to myself over what to get my wife for her birthday next month. It's the "big one"; number 60, so I can't just get her anything. It should be thoughtfull, memorable and of course expensive.

But enough of this agony, here comes my student. I've flown with him several times and today is a perfect day for aerobatics; good visibility, light winds and widely scattered clouds; maybe we'll even dance with the cotton for a few minutes. I brief the mission; starting with spins, then on to loops, rolls, Cuban 8's and hammarheads and inverted flight. He says he wants to do a tail slide. So we talk about that and then step to the airplane.

I help him into the parachute and into the front cockpit; getting his shoulder harness and lap belt cinched down nice and tight and review the emergency egress procedures. I then hop into to the rear cockpit and get myself situated as well; set the altimeter to zero. Zero out the G-meter and fire up the IO-540; listen to the AWOS and get a clearance to taxi to runway 18; full length. I tell the ground controller that I'll be working 5 miles West of the airport between 4 and 10,000 ft and I'll monitor the tower freq for local traffic and squawk mode C, 1200. I give the airplane to the student, and off he goes, fish-tailing toward the runway. As always, my hands and feet guarding the flight controls and throttle. I do a quick mag and prop check, run through the cockpit; checking and setting all the stuff; fuel, trim, flight controls, transponder and canopy. Call the tower. Get a clearance. And give the airplane back to the student for the takeoff. Off we go, climbing Westbound to 5,000 ft AGL (for training my hard deck is 3,000 ft AGL); setting up for a normal, upright, one-turn spin.

Well, we go through all the maneuvers and finally get to the tail slide. The student sets 25 square on the engine and pulls just shy of 6 g's into the vertical. I'm grunting to stay awake. Now we're going straight up, through 6,000 ft AGL . and my mind meanders back to that birthday gift dilema again. Maybe I should trade her car in for a new one; put a ribbon with a big bow on it and surprise her. Hell, she's only got a little over 12,000 miles on her 4-runner; and she likes it. Nah. Not the right idea. Or, maybe head over to my friends jewelry store; pick out a nice ladies Brietling watch. Hmmm. Now that might be the ticket. I notice that the airplane has gone from the vertical, to on it's back; still with 25 squared on the engine. And we're starting around; A full blown; pure & simple; inverted flat spin. We go around once. And twice. And then it came to me. I know exactly what I'll get her.

Somewhere in the excitement of having a huge burden lifted from my shoulders, I heard a high-pitch scream over the intercom; "YOU'VE GOT IT".

I'll tell ya folks. There's nothing like an aerobatic flight to align the priorities; clear the mind. And solve the mysteries of human relationships. If I were a psychiatrist this is where I'd have my couch.

That'll be $300 please.

Edited July 24, 2010 by Chiller

[nsplayr]

Great story man.

[contraildash]

Great story and all, but what did you get her? :)

[fastnumber15]

Sick. Now go get her a big dutch oven and call it a day.

[Chiller]

Great story and all, but what did you get her? :)

a Lawnboy

[contraildash]

a Lawnboy

Well played! Looking forward to some more stories.

And to whomever negatived me, seriously?

[Stitch]

a Lawnboy

As in the lawn maintenance/cutting machine or some form of cougar appropriate gift? I keed, I keed…

[Chiller]

As in the lawn maintenance/cutting machine or some form of cougar appropriate gift? I keed, I keed…

Hmm....hadn't thought of that. Hahaaa...