Drug Testing Confidence

[uhhello]

Don't worry, your piss and career are in good hands....

https://www.militarytimes.com/news/your-military/2024/11/14/piss-poor-inside-the-sloppy-practices-of-a-military-urinalysis-lab/#:~:text=A Marine Corps gunnery sergeant,Corps Court of Criminal Appeals

“The Sailors and Marines who face the devastating consequences of a criminal conviction while being afforded diminished constitutional protections should expect, and this Court will require, substantial compliance with the Department of the Navy’s urinalysis program,” appeal judge Navy Capt. Brian Mizer wrote in the ruling overturning Hirst’s conviction.

 

 

The gunny pleaded not guilty at trial in April 2022 and was initially convicted, reduced in rank to sergeant and sentenced to 90 days in the brig.

 

[arg]

Same stuff happened in the 80s. A Navy lab in FL that the AF was sending samples to.

[Skitzo]

Having had my first UA since getting to Naval War College I can say that the Navy handles it way differently. Probably owing to the fact that they have to be able to do it while under way as well.

Every Air Force base I’ve ever been to has a dedicated place to go, and a civilian manager usually runs it. The list is tightly controlled and I’ve only ever been notified by phone. You have to sign the order to go. There are templates and examples for how to fill out the information etc.

War College: List goes out via email to everyone. There is no official paper signed order to go. There are no examples or designated places to put your sample. It’s just not as standardized.


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[uhhello]

37 minutes ago, Skitzo said:

Having had my first UA since getting to Naval War College I can say that the Navy handles it way differently. Probably owing to the fact that they have to be able to do it while under way as well.

Every Air Force base I’ve ever been to has a dedicated place to go, and a civilian manager usually runs it. The list is tightly controlled and I’ve only ever been notified by phone. You have to sign the order to go. There are templates and examples for how to fill out the information etc.

War College: List goes out via email to everyone. There is no official paper signed order to go. There are no examples or designated places to put your sample. It’s just not as standardized.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeah most of my af experiences have been very by the book but that’s just the customer side that we see. 

[disgruntledemployee]

I worked with a JAG guy once and later ran into him.  He swapped from prosecutor to defense as he said it's part of their career progression. He had gotten someone a not guilty on a drug charge from a urinalysis by decimating the process/program.

[ClearedHot]

On 12/29/2024 at 12:13 PM, disgruntledemployee said:

I worked with a JAG guy once and later ran into him.  He swapped from prosecutor to defense as he said it's part of their career progression. He had gotten someone a not guilty on a drug charge from a urinalysis by decimating the process/program.

Have a bro who had his career ended by a poppy seed muffin.  Dude was a stud aviator, carried the bag for a four star, multiple BPZ and was a genuine humble great human.  He popped positive and a brand new One Star made it his mission in life to end him.  He fought it and won...sort of.  His JAG had the sample retested and they were able to prove the amount was minute, he even had the Sam's Club receipt for the muffins.  Said One Star kept him in a holding pattern for two years and he lost his OG slot.  He punched at 21 years and went to industry then started his own company.  Now a Multi-millionaire so he won in the end....but USAF lost a great leader.

[ViperMan]

3 hours ago, ClearedHot said:

Have a bro who had his career ended by a poppy seed muffin.  Dude was a stud aviator, carried the bag for a four star, multiple BPZ and was a genuine humble great human.  He popped positive and a brand new One Star made it his mission in life to end him.  He fought it and won...sort of.  His JAG had the sample retested and they were able to prove the amount was minute, he even had the Sam's Club receipt for the muffins.  Said One Star kept him in a holding pattern for two years and he lost his OG slot.  He punched at 21 years and went to industry then started his own company.  Now a Multi-millionaire so he won in the end....but USAF lost a great leader.

I'm guessing that guy doesn't watch Seinfeld? Or the general for that matter...

[brabus]

@ClearedHot Please tell me that d-bag 1 star has his name spread everywhere and is blackballed at every airline and industry business.

[Sua Sponte]

39 minutes ago, brabus said:

@ClearedHot Please tell me that d-bag 1 star has his name spread everywhere and is blackballed at every airline and industry business.

Those dudes become "consultants" since they're older once they retire.

[ClearedHot]

8 hours ago, Sua Sponte said:

Those dudes become "consultants" since they're older once they retire.

Exactly....he got a second star and was very "disappointment" when he didn't become the AFSOC/CC, retired and has been consulting ever since.

[Smokin]

Talked with a JAG that absolutely hated prosecuting drug test results.  Basically said the best you can hope for is for the individual to be discharged since you can never prove intent unless they confess.  And that's assuming that everyone in the custody chain and the lab did their job and paperwork correctly.

[nsplayr]

1 hour ago, Smokin said:

Talked with a JAG that absolutely hated prosecuting drug test results.  Basically said the best you can hope for is for the individual to be discharged since you can never prove intent unless they confess.  And that's assuming that everyone in the custody chain and the lab did their job and paperwork correctly.

It's almost like we should end our extensive, poorly-functioning drug testing regime and actually just focus on the relatively few people who are causing problems with their substance abuse (drugs & also alcohol) rather than regularly collecting gallons of piss from > 35 year old career officers & NCOs...

Just don't ask about the 3x Zyns I have shoved up my butthole so I don't fall asleep on another Mids shift 😇

Edited December 31, 2024 by nsplayr

[ClearedHot]

27 minutes ago, nsplayr said:

It's almost like we should end our extensive, poorly-functioning drug testing regime and actually just focus on the relatively few people who are causing problems with their substance abuse (drugs & also alcohol) rather than regularly collecting gallons of piss from > 35 year old career officers & NCOs on a regular basis...

Just don't ask about the 3x Zyns I have shoved up my butthole so I don't fall asleep on another Mids shift 😇

I was "randomly tested" each month for my last three months on active duty including the Thursday before my final out the following Monday.

[Prosuper]

Random my ass, every time I went on leave to my place in Colorado, I usually had three straight weeks of "random" drug tests.  Now that I'm retired Sticky Ickies in Pueblo gets my business, wrenching on jets for 40 years has taken a toll on my body and a gummy before bed helps. Just before I retired from active duty in 03, I remember our CC ordering the Poppie Seed muffins removed from the snack bar because of guys popping positive.   

[slc]

Wasn't there a SecDef/AF/DOD memo that came out a year ago "warning" of the possibility of popping positive due to poppy seed consumption?  Basically a "we can't stop you from eating a poppy seed muffin but do so at your own risk"  

[TreeA10]

I got "randomly selected" multiple times in quick succession as a Reservist.  After the 4th test, I sent a letter to the WG/CC with a courtesy copy to the Medical CC with a list of possible OSHA violations.  Never heard a thing from anybody but was never drug tested again over the next 8+ years until I retired.

[uhhello]

You can't convince me they don't do mass tests out of the big bucket of piss they collect.  Almost every time I got selected, I was immediately re-tested and then tested again.  I don't think in 23 years that I was selected and then didn't have multiple repeat tests.  

[arg]

After a couple of "random" tests I asked the shirt about it. He said they try to pick the ones they think will pass.

[Smokin]

On 12/31/2024 at 11:08 AM, nsplayr said:

Just don't ask about the 3x Zyns I have shoved up my butthole so I don't fall asleep on another Mids shift 😇

That may explain the 3x Zyns, but hardly covers the other items BQzip's mom put there...

[brabus]

8 hours ago, Smokin said:

That may explain the 3x Zyns, but hardly covers the other items BQzip's mom put there...

Heard she has a 6.7L diesel powered vibrator with nav wings engraved on it…will need nsplayr to confirm the color. 

[Bigred]

On 12/28/2024 at 1:13 PM, Skitzo said:

Having had my first UA since getting to Naval War College I can say that the Navy handles it way differently. Probably owing to the fact that they have to be able to do it while under way as well.

Every Air Force base I’ve ever been to has a dedicated place to go, and a civilian manager usually runs it. The list is tightly controlled and I’ve only ever been notified by phone. You have to sign the order to go. There are templates and examples for how to fill out the information etc.

War College: List goes out via email to everyone. There is no official paper signed order to go. There are no examples or designated places to put your sample. It’s just not as standardized.


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First time getting notified of a urinalysis in the Air Force, after so many years in the Navy, was an interesting interaction. 

I get a random phone call in the morning
Random GS civilian - "sir, you have to come to office 6969 and bring your id"
Me - "ok, no problem, what for? 
GS - "i can't tell you, you have to come here"
Me - "ok, if you won't tell me, I'm not coming. have a good day"

I ended up having the urinalysis monitor come to my office and explain it to me. He was pissed but I told him I don't answer to random GS civlians that won't explain what they want. Still had to give the sample but the monitor ended up apologzing to me about it. 

I still don't understand the AF formality of it all. The Navy, you'd get a phone call or an email and it was essentially "hey man, go pee by the end of the day". 

Edited Thursday at 04:39 AM by Bigred

[brabus]

Most of my interactions have gone something like:

- chief walks into the room, has “the look”

- Me: “oh hey chief, I’m running late for a sim brief, see ya later!”

- Chief: “sounds good, I’ll tell them you were in the sim”

There are good chiefs out there.

[nsplayr]

16 hours ago, brabus said:

Heard she has a 6.7L diesel powered vibrator with nav wings engraved on it…will need nsplayr to confirm the color. 

They're blue, just like our beloved Falcon 💙

[Biff_T]

6 hours ago, nsplayr said:

They're blue, just like our beloved Falcon 💙

Lol

Break, break

I had about 15-20 piss tests during 20 years of AD.   The last one was during the week of my retirement ceremony.  Good thing they didn't check for booze.   

Edited Friday at 03:20 AM by Biff_T
Ingles es muy dificil.

[FourFans]

On 1/2/2025 at 9:19 PM, Biff_T said:

Good thing they didn't check for booze.