Radio etiquette

[FallingOsh]

it's always obvious when someone is making a radio call they are reading out of their "so you want to rearn engrish" book

"You contact bridgee. You make attack."

"Say friendly position."

"Bridgee"

"Your position is on the bridge?"

"Rogee. Make attack"

"You want me to hit your position?"

"Rogee."

"We're done here."

[pawnman]

"You contact bridgee. You make attack."

"Say friendly position."

"Bridgee"

"Your position is on the bridge?"

"Rogee. Make attack"

"You want me to hit your position?"

"Rogee."

"We're done here."

Is that the Koreans or the French?

[brabus]

Is that the Koreans or the French?

Standard DAK JTAC. If you've never worked with a Korean JTAC, you have no room to talk about worthless and horrible JTACs.

[Guest]

"You contact bridgee. You make attack."

"Say friendly position."

"Bridgee"

"Your position is on the bridge?"

"Rogee. Make attack"

"You want me to hit your position?"

"Rogee."

"We're done here."

"DAK GFAC, Misty 69 checking in with charlie, say friendly position"

"Roger Misty, you know Pocheon town?"

"Affirmative"

"Rog, Pocheon town not you target."

"Copy, say friendly position"

"Misty you know Dongducheon town?"

"Affirmative"

"You know Donchudeon town?!"

"Affirmative"

"Ok Misty! Donchudeon town not you target. Misty, you call ready IP ID."

"Misty 69's ready, and I'm still going to need the friendly position"

"OK Misty, you IP 10 mile south target"

"What? I need the friendly position"

"Ok, Misty, you call ready target ID"

"Go ahead and I still need friendly positions"

"Ok Misty, you target 10 mile nors IP"

"Listen, you need to give me the friendly position and either coordinates or a talk on to the target"

"Ok Misty, you call departing IP"

"Negative, I need the friendly position"

2 minutes of Hongul secure between DAK GFAC and DAK fighters

"DAK 1, base"

"Stand by DAK 1"

"DAK 1 een hot"

"DAK 1 ABORT and return to the IP"

"Two base"

"DAK 1 you creared hot"

"Negative, DAK 1 ABORT and return to the IP"

"DAK 1 off hot"

"DAK 2 een hot"

"DAK 2 ABORT!"

"DAK 3, creared hot"

"DAK 2 off hot"

"Misty, DAK recrest BDA"

"Are you shitting me? Zero BDA, possible fratricide. Safe 'em up, RTB and don't come back"

"No Misty, prease to have betta BDA"

"You heard me, zero BDA, possible fratricide"

"Misty, you butthead"

[brabus]

Hahaha, nice Rainman...I can safely say things have not changed one bit since you were here. My first intro to DAK JTACs was we said ready to copy 9 line and he goes:

"East xyz, line 1-3, North xyz, etc" "How copy?"

"DAK, we didn't copy any of that, repeat 9 line in order...starting with line 1, then line 2. How copy"

"Oh ok, call when ready?"

"Ready to copy"

"East xyz..."

Over Aux: "Dude, you gotta be shitting me"

Yep, that was the first excursion...and it only gets worse.

[M2]

OK, just a joke but it best fits here...

St Louis approach to United : "United 126 best forward speed to the marker, you are number one”.

United 126 (male voice) : "Roger, balls to the wall”.

St. Louis approach to American : "American 4521, you are number two behind United 126, follow him, cleared visual, best forward speed”.

American 4521 (female voice) : "Well I cannot do balls to the wall, but I can do wide open”.

Radio silence, then an unidentified male Pilot : "Is American hiring?"

[morenoj135]

The "Aaaaaaaaaaaand" also drives me nuts. Think about what you are going to say and then say it.

To show a little age here - the aaaaaaaaand is actually a hold over from the old HF days when the radios needed a tone to key in on and we did this by saying "Annnnnnnnd." There should be no need for this with the newer radios.

[morenoj135]

Saying good morning to ATC - On approach to Athens, Greece

Co: Kalemare Athini, Bozo 22, request vectors for approach

ATC: Happy squid to you Bozo 22, turn heading 345 and begin descent

Kalimera is good day, kalemare is an appetizer - if you're going to say good morning, good evening, ets; at least get it right.

And as for nicknames based on mess ups - talk to the young nav who got his finger stuck in the O2 bottle and then called command post to send out a life support guy to help him out - his new Delta Tau name from then until forever is "Pinky."

[HerkFE]

To show a little age here - the aaaaaaaaand is actually a hold over from the old HF days when the radios needed a tone to key in on and we did this by saying "Annnnnnnnd." There should be no need for this with the newer radios.

Roger that. Over.....

[Champ Kind]

How copy...?

If we are going to have a thread on radio etiquette we could have one hell of a thread jack on command post personnel.

[Hercster]

^That does annoy the crap out of me. We're going to read it back anyway and then you'll see "how (we) copy."

On a sidenote, flying around Iraq two years ago, ground guy takes our next leg info:

"Herc xx, what's the name of the city next to that base?"

I attempt to pronounce and proceed to butcher it.

Ground: "That's a mouthful"

Me: "That's what she said"

Silence...

[magnetfreezer]

"At this time..." and repeating every callsign twice when calling C2/ATC.

[ThreeHoler]

"Be advised..." FML I hate that phrase.

[XL0901]

When I ask where the crew bus after an hour, don't tell me "enroute". Where the fuck is "enroute"? A simple "I don't know how to do my job" or "I'll call them again" is just fine.

[ATIS]

"At this time..." .

I just shake my head at this one...well no ######ing shit it's ATT...if I'm telling you about it as it happens.

If I heard this in one of my stacks from another ISR asset....I would go over and personally talk with the guy/gal who was keying the mic no matter what rank. Typically my debriefs were directed toward that 4-smoking engined shitcan of death that was in our AOR at the time, or the fresh meat coming into our platform (who quickly learned).

Easy Herc folks...i'm not talking about you (AC types).

ATIS

[Rmarsh]

I just shake my head at this one...well no ######ing shit it's ATT...if I'm telling you about it as it happens.

If I heard this in one of my stacks from another ISR asset....I would go over and personally talk with the guy/gal who was keying the mic no matter what rank. Typically my debriefs were directed toward that 4-smoking engined shitcan of death that was in our AOR at the time, or the fresh meat coming into our platform (who quickly learned).

Easy Herc folks...i'm not talking about you (AC types).

ATIS

Speaking of a four smoking engined shitcan, our radio operators (part of the mission crew) always do radio checks with the command post when they turn on the mission UHF's, and when they are done with the check, EVERY one of them says "thanks for the radio check, Sentry XX out". Uhh, you're welcome? Happy to put down the angry birds for two seconds and say "loud and clear"? It sounds so stupid to me and I just don't get it...

[sky_king]

Oh the 13B hate...

[Rmarsh]

Oh the 13B hate...

I know what you meant and this is splitting hairs, but RO's are 1A-somethings not 13B's

Edited May 22, 2013 by Rmarsh

[Azimuth]

How copy...?

If we are going to have a thread on radio etiquette we could have one hell of a thread jack on command post personnel.

Or Dyess crews screaming into the mic during their 30-minute out call.

[HerkFE]

How copy...?

F me to F'ing tears....I literally want throat punch people who say that.

"Smuck 123, radio check. How copy?" Well no shit, you want to know how they copy? SMDH

[HU&W]

Or Dyess crews screaming into the mic during their 30-minute out call.

Or 30 minute out calls.

[Guest USAFFlyBoy]

P: Ground, Pilot. Confirm engines are clear?

G: rog

P: so...that's a yes/affirmative then?

G: rog

[jango220]

My T-6 flight IPs came up with an interesting way to break us of the "at this time" habit. If we ever said that phrase during a stand-up, they would stop you and say "not at this time, try again in 2 minutes." So you'd be standing there in an awkward silence, sweating bullets and waiting to talk again. Erased it from our vocab in a week.

[Rmarsh]

P: Ground, Pilot. Confirm engines are clear?

G: rog

P: so...that's a yes/affirmative then?

G: rog

Yep. "Copy/Roger/Affirmative". It all means the same...

[Torch]

I remember specifically while doing Instruments and on in T-6s at Vance, it was standard procedure to say "Clearance Delivery, XXXX 69, clearance on request, ready to copy" - at which time they'd give you the clearance, you'd read back, brakes off lets go.

I did that at Rucker, first time and my IP said "what the hell are you saying", from which point I just said "dunno.. but, its what we always did". Henceforth, "Clearance, XXXX 69, <insert departure> <insert destination etc>". Receive squawk, have a great day.

Yep. "Copy/Roger/Affirmative". It all means the same...

Actually it doesn't. "Roger" is the controller saying "I've heard you" but it is not a clearance to do whatever you asked. Affirmative is the "I've heard you, and approve your request" response. Made that mistake once, and never forgot it.

Edited May 23, 2013 by Torch